


Make You Better

by drjamband



Category: Mercy Street (TV)
Genre: Episode: s02e04 Southern Mercy, F/M, First Kiss, Light Angst, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-15
Updated: 2017-02-15
Packaged: 2018-09-24 13:46:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,141
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9744029
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/drjamband/pseuds/drjamband
Summary: Spoilers for Season 2 Episode 4.Emma and Henry talked about what happened in Germantown.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Guys this is the first thing I've actually finished since like October 2015.

_ Let it all unbreak you to the day you met her. _

_ And it’d make you better. _

 

Emma was returning some supplies to the closet when she heard shaky breathing, labored and coming in bursts like a rattling train.  She peered around the corner and tried to conceal her gasp when she saw the chaplain with his knees to his chest, his eyes clenched shut and his face set in a painful grimace.  She set down her basket and went to him.

“Chaplain, are you well?” she asked, kneeling in front of him.

The chaplain’s eyes popped open.  “Miss Green,” he said, then shut his eyes again.

Emma straightened as footsteps came closer, and a moment later she made eye contact with Dr. Foster.  “Miss Green, is everything alright?” he asked, looking at her with furrowed brows.

“Oh yes, Dr. Foster.  The chaplain isn’t feeling well and I was just about to escort him to his room.”

Dr. Foster opened his mouth, then closed it again and tilted his chin as if in thought.  “Right,” he said finally.  “Well, ask for me if you need anything.”

“Thank you, Dr. Foster,” Emma replied before helping the chaplain to his feet and guiding him towards the stairs.

Once in the chaplain’s room, Emma sat him on the bed and moved back, unsure whether to leave or to start the conversation she’d been wanting to have for some days.  “Are you feeling any better?” she asked, but the chaplain did not answer.  “If I have done something wrong, please---.”

“No,” the chaplain said, though he seemed to struggle just to get the word out.  “You have not.  It was me.  I have---.”

Emma moved closer and knelt in front of him.  “That man would have killed us,” she said gently.

The chaplain nodded, though his face was tight with pain.  Finally he looked to the ceiling and swallowed hard.  “I made a vow to God, Miss Green.  And I broke that vow...because of you.”

“I am sorry,” Emma apologized, wiping her hands on her dress and moving to stand again.

“Stop.  I have already said it is not you who is at fault.  It is me, and my own failings.  My duty is to God and now I have...I have failed in that duty.  How can I go on preaching on Sunday and standing by the boys’ bedsides when I will be a hypocrite of the worst kind?”  

Emma said nothing, for she hadn’t the slightest notion of how to respond.  Finally, unable to bear the silence, she said, “But surely God will forgive you.”

“I don’t know,” the chaplain replied, and his voice was watery.  “Ever since I stood over that first dead boy I have questioned this war.  Would a just God have let it come to this?  Would He have let us go on for so long killing each other without a thought?  That man the other night….That man was ready to kill us both for no reason other than our differing ideas.  He did not know us, but he had already judged us.  I question God’s motives in letting this evil come to this country and letting it fester here.  I am not sure I can spread His teachings when our reality is so much to the contrary.”  The chaplain took off his jacket and unbuttoned his vest, standing to place them over the chair in the room before sitting heavily on the bed once more.

Emma moved to him again.  She really didn’t know how to comfort someone who usually did all the comforting himself, but she had come to learn in this war how to go headlong into a situation for which you were not prepared.  “I think we must do the best we can with what we have<” she said.  “I have questioned the necessity of this war myself.  My entire family thinks the rebels are doing right by fixing to secede from this country by any means necessary.  But they are living in a time that no longer exists.  I see those boys down there, crying for their mommas, their girlfriends, their wives.  Boys bleeding and gasping for breath.  Most of all I see fear.  And in my mind I can no longer justify what is happening.  That scares me.  But in my heart I know what is right is taking care of those boys, comforting them when they have no one else.  Giving them a little bit of hope, even when there is none.  All the rules we lived by before this war are gone.  We have to guide ourselves now.  We have to do what we feel is best.”

The chaplain heard Emma’s soft, urgent words, and he felt her breath on his face.  Logically he knew he should make some excuse to get her to leave so he could be alone to put his thoughts back in order.  Was it not God’s way to test His children’s faith, especially the children close to Him?  Yet perhaps this was a different sort of test.  Perhaps he was being asked to let go of his previous notions of faith and open his mind to letting his heart guide him, as Emma had said.

Emma continued to stare at him, her expression curious.  He licked his lips and leaned closer, one hand reaching to the back of her neck, the other moving to her waist.  “Emma,” he murmured, his eyes fluttering and his heart racing.

“Henry,” she replied, and they were kissing again, hard and urgent.  

Henry’s palms were sweating and his fingers trembled against Emma’s cool skin.  They parted, and he could hear Emma’s shuddering breaths.  “Emma,” he said again, and oh God, all his life he’d been praying but  _ this _ , this was the most ardent of them all, a plea for everything she was willing to give and a confession that he wanted it all.

A knock on the door startled them, and Emma jumped up and opened the door.

“Hello, Miss Green,” Dr. Foster greeted.  “I had a few spare moments and decided to check on the chaplain.”  Emma opened the door wider and Dr. Foster stepped in.  “Are you well, Chaplain?”  he turned to Miss Green.  “What were his symptoms?”

“Oh, it was nothing but a dizzy spell, Dr. Foster.  I had Belinda bring me some of her corn cakes and gave him some water.  He told me he skipped breakfast.”  She turned to face Henry.  “Now that just won’t do, Chaplain.  You’ve got to keep your health.”

Henry nodded his acknowledgement.  “Thank you, Miss Green.  I appreciate your help.”

Dr. Foster moved to leave.  “Miss Green, if you’ll come with me.  There are a few soldiers whose bandages require care.”

Emma turned one last time to Henry and gave him a shy smile before closing the door behind her.


End file.
